By Paul Davis
When my heart is overwhelmed, my emotions frazzled and my mental faculties fried; I continually return to me, myself and I. Upon coming to the end of myself, I realize when there is nothing else. It is then that I turn within for renewal, refreshing and revelation.
Emotional exhaustion can come at the end of a laborious work week, after a long vacation with the in-laws or during a duel with your darling damsel to whom you are married. Interaction with people can be both invigorating as well as intimidating. It can be fun and at times furious. Our emotions can run the gamut during relational interaction of all sorts and kinds with various people. Some exchanges are more pleasant than others.
If you are in the people business or a relational person, you are more sucsceptible to interpersonal disappointment and conflict. This is because of the frequency of your interactions and the intensity of your expectations. Professions demanding less involvement with people can often be far less stressful due to the removal of the relational component. Things don’t have expectations or complaints. These come from people.
That being said, it should be no surprise where emotional exhaustion originates. Unlike intellectual exhaustion that flows from books and placing high demands upon the brain, emotional exhaustion typically occurs from placing high demands upon our emotions when engaged interpersonally with people in varying contexts.
Priests feel it when they must juggle a range of emotions from interacting with people in differing seasons of life. Their congregations are full of people marrying, burying, celebrating newborns, considering divorcing spouses, and committee members in conflict. Priests must access a wide array of emotions to show themselves sympathetic, understanding, celebratory and wise hearted.
Medical doctors feel it when they must emphathize with dying patients, grieving family members, pregnant mothers, ill children, nurses in under staffed hospitals, pharmacists on the telephone and insurance malpractice claims adjusters.
Mothers feel it when they must lovingly support their husbands, rear their children by day, be a lover at night, a social butterfly on the weekends with their friends, serve in their community in some capacity, provide chauffering to and cheerleading at their kids sporting events, and be a chef for three square meals a day.
Sales persons feel it when they must be aggressive to procure leads, cultivate new clients, sweeten deals, negotiate closings and follow-up for future sales. Not to mention there are employee interactions, competeing sales persons, emotionally needy secretaries, money hungry executive managers pushing them to their wits end to produce and clients who rescind on their contracts. Add to this all of the family interactions that any sane person would have after work and during the weekend, which compiled apart from any personal space could drive the most stable soul insane.
Emotional exhaustion therefore can effect us all at various times. We therefore should acknowledge our need for personal space, time to refuel and earnest desire to regroup when necessary. Such times do not devalue any persons dearest to us. In fact it is just the opposite. Because after being refreshed we can return to being at our best, when we are most loving and useful to those who we love and need us most.
Here are 7 Secrets to Refuel Your Emotionally Exhausted Soul:
1. Take time alone where you can rest. Physical rest provides both bodily and emotional rest and renewal simultaneously.
2. Find a quiet place to meditate. Secure a place to think, dream and plan your life. This allows you to see the forest from the trees.
3. Engage in a hobby where you can allow yourself to indulge. Take some me time. For some that means being alone. Others find it refreshing to be around friends who understand and can rejoice with them. Whatever wholesome indulgence makes you feel best, incorporate such into your week.
4. Politely remove yourself from intrusions of the soul. Use an answer machine to handle annoying people and calls. When a stranger comes knocking at your door, look through the peep whole. If you’re not interested in talking to them don’t.
5. Say no without feeling guilty when asked to do something you don’t want to do. It’s your life. Live it your way!
6. Delegate and leverage your dollars to get others to do the work you most dislike that most drains you. Prefer work that you are most passionate about and which you excel at doing. By doing so your energy will be protected, optimized and your creativity realized.
7. Use your most productive hours of the day to create your world, pursue your dreams and plan your strategy. Use the less energetic hours of your day (be it day or night for you) to do activities you least prefer and are excited about. Often these tasks are maintenance oriented.
By no means is my method the cure all, but surely it has got you thinking in the right direction to formulate your own strategy for overcoming emotional exhaustion and maximizing your energy levels.
It has been said that success is not determined by what you say yes to, but rather by what you say no to. Structure your life in such a way to erect boundaries and perimeters to protect your focus. What you tolerate will dominate. Make your expectations known when relating with others, while seeking to understand and clarify their expectations of you. Be realistic and make yourself clear as to what you can and cannot do to lessen relational pressure.
An undivided focus directed toward your primary life’s purpose will undoubtedly invigorate you within and move you forward with dynamic momentum. Regain your focus and life’s purpose. Upon pinpointing your passion and wholeheartedly pursuing it, you will regain your heart.
Say no to intruders, intrusions and that which erodes your focus. It’s your life! Now live it your way without apology.
Paul Davis is author of Breakthrough for a Broken Heart a book telling us “How to overcome disappointments and blossom into your dreams!” He is a minister, life coach (relational & professional), dating expert, popular worldwide keynote speaker, creative consultant, humor being, adventurer, explorer, mediator, liberator and dream-maker.
Paul’s compassion for people & passion to travel has taken him to over 50 countries of the world where he has had a tremendous impact. Paul has also brought revival to many in war-torn, impoverished and tsunami stricken regions of the earth. His nonprofit organization Dream-Maker Ministries is building dreams and breaking limitations.
Paul’s Breakthrough Seminars inspire, revive, awaken, impregnate with purpose, impart the fire of desire, catapult people into a new level of self-awareness, facilitate destiny discovery and dream fulfillment.
Paul can be contacted for life coaching and speaking at: RevivingNations@yahoo.com 407-967-7553.
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